You know yourself and perhaps the family member you care for better than anyone else. Where there are instances where health just doesn't seem to be improving or something just doesn't seem right, sometimes you must be the "squeaky wheel".
Terry was having bouts of sleeplessness, anxiety, poor appetite and just didn't want to participate in the usual activities. After several calls to her physician by her son, the physician said it was probably just her Alzheimer's going into a different stage. The doctor prescribed a new medication and hoped the symptoms would improve. After two weeks of no improvement and escalated feelings of panic, Terry was sent to a psychiatric hospital for review. On the first day there, she left a group session, went back to her room and proceeded to drink two bottles of shampoo and eat a tube of toothpaste. After this incident Terry regretted what happened and said she just wanted to get better. The hospital released Terry a few days later with a change in medication only for sleep.
I recently received calls from a daughter caring for her mother and a man with no family in his 90's. Both older persons were in nursing homes and wanted to go home, but did not know how. Did you ever imagine getting to a place in your life where you didn't know how to go home? This brings back memories of Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz wanting to go home, but not realizing she had the power to do so simply by clicking the heels of her ruby slippers.
Both individuals are relatively able bodied and resolute in their desire to go home. There is no reason mentally or physically for them to remain in the nursing home, especially since they are at a point where they are paying privately for care. Neither person realized that they can just go home. Yes, both individuals will need some help at home to remain independent, but going home is not impossible.
"About 15 to 20 percent of all diagnoses are missed or flat-out incorrect," according to Lori Parch in an article titled Danger at Your Doctor's Office. (1) Today, more than ever, we need to understand the details and manage our own medical care. This is especially relevant for older adults who see physicians as individuals to be revered versus questioned when they don't understand a medical treatment or why a medication is being prescribed. A recent client of mine had his physician increase the frequency of chemotherapy treatments and when I asked why, he couldn't give me an answer because he didn't question the physician.
Some European nations place a financial value on a single year of life. If an individual's health care exceeds this amount, health care treatment is denied. Do we, as Americans, really want the government deciding whether we live or die? It's time to take matters into our own hands by learning about advanced directives, palliative and hospice care.
My mother wanted to donate her body to science after she died. The thought made me a bit queasy. I didn't want my mother's body used for experimental research even though I believe that the spirit goes elsewhere, leaving the body here on earth. As time passed my mother forgot about her wish and never made arrangements. I didn't pursue the subject.
By Pamela D. Wilson, The 
Financial issues especially those involving health care issues become more prominent as we age. Divorces due to impending Medicaid or long term care issues due to Alzheimer's, Parkinson's, and MS are becoming more common from a sense of practicality.
In a study recently published in the Journal of the American Geriatrics Society*, older adults receiving assistance with activities of daily living had lower rates of acute hospitalizations versus those NOT receiving assistance. The article states that nearly 30% of adults age 75 and older have one or more disabilities in performing basic activities of daily living. These activities include: bathing, dressing, toileting, transferring/mobility and eating. Individuals who have difficulty performing these tasks use a higher number of health care dollars for physician visits and hospitalizations. Additionally, their hospital stays tend to be longer than normal.