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By Pamela D. Wilson, CSA, MS, BS/BA, CG, The Care Navigator
It often takes a critical event in our lives to bring feelings of grief. This event could be the death of a family member or even a pet, the slow progression of a disease or the sudden shock of a health emergency like a fall resulting in broken bones, a stroke or a heart attack.
Many older people surviving a health emergency experience diminished physical capacity. A person recovering from a stroke may no longer be able to dress or bathe alone and may have confusion or memory loss. Their previous sharp wit may be notably slower. A person recovering from a broken hip may have greater difficulty walking that will not improve over time.
As individuals, we mourn the loss of our own physical abilities. As caregivers, we mourn the losses of our loved one, especially if it affects our daily routine. We need to be as patient with ourselves as we are with our family members and take into consideration the amount of grief they feel about their personal situation. Finding common ground relative to what the family member still can do is important in addition to being optimistic about what the family member will be able to do as they improve their abilities or simply maintain at a new level.
Finding common ground takes a great deal of patience and compassion especially with someone who has cognitive decline. These individuals are no longer as quick as they once were. Previously it may have taken two minutes to dress and now it takes ten minutes. It is extremely important to allow individuals the opportunity to continue to perform normal daily activities in order to validate their abilities. While this can be extremely frustrating for those of us who are more able, it is extremely important to the self esteem of the individual who is doing the best they can day to day.
Depending on the individual and their ability to recover, the lost physical abilities may never be regained. Advanced age and chronic illness often comes into consideration. At best, maintenance of the new level of ability is the goal. This is usually the point where individuals or family members consider home care on a permanent basis. As we all know it is difficult to exercise or continue prescribed therapy without the motivation of another person and a regular schedule. However, this is the best way to maintain a new level of physical activity and prevent further decline.
Research indicates that dedicated exercise on a regular basis can improve the mobility and strength of adults well into their 90s. Exercise also may reduce the risk of falls. It's never to late to learn a new habit that can improve or maintain quality of life after an unexpected illness or event.
Copyright © 2009 Pamela D. Wilson All rights reserved. This publication may not be reproduced by any mechanical, photographic or electronic process, transmitted or otherwise copied for public or private use without prior written permission from the author. Website: www.thecarenavigator.com
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Children & Caregivers 
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