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By Pamela D. Wilson, CSA, MS, BS/BA, CG, The Care Navigator
When my mother passed away and I started going through medical bills, monthly bills and the bank account I discovered something shocking. My mother never once balanced her checkbook. This was a shock to me at the time because I was fanatical about balancing my checkbook to the penny. And not only that, I knew down to the penny what the money in my checking account was intended to do.
All those years growing up I thought my parents had it all together and never considered otherwise. My dad was from the Greatest Generation, a WWII veteran who completed high school and joined the Conservations Corps and later the army. My mother, whose mother passed away when she was five, took responsibility for raising her three younger siblings. She went to high school but did not finish. Four of my siblings included myself went to college, two did not.
It did not occur to me that my parents might benefit from my years of education even if it was to show my mother how to balance her checkbook. I have no idea how she managed their money all those years without actually knowing how much money was in their account. She obviously had it all figured out and they were able to set aside money for retirement, although probably not in the best vehicles to obtain a good investment return.
My parents passed away when I was in my thirties and I see many other children my age, now in my forties who have parents who may be in similar situations. I'm not sure how most parents would react, but I would suspect that if most children went to their parents to talk about balancing checkbooks and investing the conversation might be met positively.
This includes not only financial information but also planning for later legal needs and healthcare. I always say that caregiving is a family issue. This is because the responsibility for care of parents can and often does fall on their children. Mostly in unpleasant ways especially when there are little or no retirement savings to pay for healthcare needs. I believe that there is a significant benefit to families planning together. Sure this opens everyone up to know more about each other's finances than we might prefer, however it can avoid issues later in life when parents need care.
Also meaning that we as parents should start teaching our children at young ages the value of money and also work to protect our children from having to be shocked that we do not have sufficient savings or insurance to pay for our care when we are older.
It's never too late or too early to have this conversation with our parents or our children. After all, caregiving is both generational and financial. For free basic information on retirement savings and planning visit http://www.money.cnn.com//pf/retirement
Copyright © 2009 Pamela D. Wilson All rights reserved. This publication may not be reproduced by any mechanical, photographic or electronic process, transmitted or otherwise copied for public or private use without prior written permission from the author. Website: www.thecarenavigator.com
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